Feb 18

Feb 18 Three unexpected boons of Zoom

I know, I know. We’re all thoroughly screen-timed out at this stage in this 343rd, decade-long lockdown. But indulge me with just a few more minutes of screen staring time whilst I celebrate one of the things about our Covid confinement that has turned out to be an unexpected boon.

Lockdown screen time that’s been an unexpected bonus

I’m talking about Zoom. The now ubiquitous platform used by millions of people every day around the world to hold meetings, host webinars, teach classes, do consultations, even conduct funerals. And, vitally, to connect with family and friends.

I know we’ve all grown used to, and yes, more than a little weary of, the standard start to any Zoom call - “can you see me?”, “you’re on mute”, “sorry, problems with my connection”, you know the script. (And if you’re not someone with a business account, once everyone is present and correctly visible and audible, there’s the pressure of the timed countdown to your 40 minute call cut-off.)

And I certainly appreciate if you’re someone who has to ‘attend’ endless Zoom meetings for your work, its appeal has well and truly worn thin by now.

But for now I’d like to focus on what I’ve found to be three particular, life and mental-health-enhancing bonuses that Zoom has brought me over this past year of lockdowns.

Zoom boon no 1 - Family Fridays

Friday has always been an evening when as many of us as possible have gathered together for dinner in my family. Busy lives and geography have meant that over the years, the numbers around the table have fluctuated and dwindled.

Early on in the first lockdown, and with my mum’s mental well-being very much at the forefront of all our concerns, we instigated a family Friday night Zoom call. Every week since then we have convened at our separate tables and shared food (not literally, obviously) and news.

And although we don’t all join the call every week, more of us do than when we ate together in person. Including, to mum’s immense delight, far more regular appearances by her much-loved grandchildren.

Rarely does a call go by without her declaring the time we spend virtually together as a highlight of her week.

Zoom boon no 2 - far-flung pals

Always important, friendships have become the bedrock of our well-being over this past trying year. And whilst we can still see some of those all-important pals in person for a one-on-one walk, technology has become a vital tool for staying in touch with many others.

In particular, for me, the combination of constrained lives (meaning we all have a little more time to spare) and the power of Zoom, has prompted, and facilitated a regular catch-up with a group of friends who have been a part of my life since we all met at school aged 11 (I simply refuse to add up how many years ago that is).

Whilst we’ve stayed in touch over the years, with one of our gang living in California, one in Cornwall/Greece (she has homes in both heavenly spots. Envious? Moi?) and three of us scattered around London, we’ve rarely been all together in person.

Now, every 3-4 weeks we meet up, and crucially actually see each other, on Zoom and for sometimes as long as two hours, we talk, laugh, occasionally cry, reminisce and ferociously put the world to rights.

Zoom boon no 3 - friends I’ve never met

Early last year, I was introduced by email to a woman whose professional, academic and personal interest in ageing well our shared contact thought we’d enjoy exploring.

She was right. In just a couple of phone calls we established that there was definitely scope for delving further into our joint passion and experience, and we started to make arrangements to meet.

For reasons I’m sure I don’t need to explain, that meeting has never happened. But what has happened instead is that she has gathered together a group of women who share our interest and our desire to change the conversation around, and experience of, ageing.

One of them is in Ottawa. One of them is in Florida. One of them is in Chicago. One of them is on the outskirts of London. And the woman who convened us all is in Suffolk (although for the past two months she has been in Senegal for the wedding of her son). We range in age from 59 to 72. Two are Canadian, three are Americans. I’m the only Brit. We all come from different professional and personal backgrounds.

And for two hours every week without fail, we gather together on Zoom and share our stories, our experiences, our views and our thoughts. It’s truly astonishing how close we’ve all become in such a very short space of time. And how much our connection to each other has become an important part of our individual support systems.

And yet, we have never met each other in person.

And if that’s not the perfect illustration of the positive power of Zoom, I don’t know what is.

Do you have a lockdown Zoom story to share? I’d love to hear it!